The rise and fall of the veterinary medicine empire

Gather round and hear the story of how a noble profession battles the odds
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Sep 01, 2011

Listen, my children, and you shall learn how mighty empires rise and achieve great fame only to disappear like tiny pieces of sand in the desert wind.

In the year 1979, there came upon this great land a plague. It brought great sorrow to our canine companions only to be vanquished by vaccination and diligence on the part of our unsung heroes—the veterinarians of the kingdom.

The army of veterinarians labored hard, and they were rewarded for their efforts. Many of them purchased new chariots and refurbished their castle moats and dungeons with the spoils of war gained from their battle with the evil parvovirus. Three decades have passed, and the plague of parvovirus has become nothing in the eyes of those in the kingdom who had not lost family members in those hours of travail.

Now, long after that battle ended, those noble warriors for truth, justice and the good fight to stamp out canine and feline disease find it harder to maintain their castles and feed their families. Fewer people in the kingdom seek the services of their veterinarian protectors and their powerful weapons.

Our nation's citizens abandoned the old ways

Now, the number of citizens choosing between fodder for their livestock and bread for their families and who still seek this protection fell to one in 20. Then it fell to one in 10 and now, the specter of as many as one in five abandoning the armor of vaccination appears on the horizon. To make matters worse, with the millennium having passed without the dire consequences our wizards predicted, a different and diffident disarmament has been ordered by the will of the populace.

Not so long ago, three in 10 of those medical cases dealing with the skin were caused by our foe the flea. Many of our canine and feline allies suffered because of these blood-sucking enemies.

Our weapons manufacturers invented an invisible armor to ward off the pests. Except for those less-hospitable climes, where these flea foes prosper not, veterinarians did not suffer from the sudden lack of flea foes. The profits from armor sales compensated for the loss of dermatology income.